Eat. Pray. Travel.

“It is better to see something once than to hear about it a thousand times.”–Asian Proverb

My life right now is crazy, I have 348 things on a plate that only holds 10. Between working a full time job, planning my wedding, working out, moving to a new house and trying to launch my new business, life just gets in the way. So, I decided I would write about something I love, traveling.

My favorite possession is my passport. I think of it as a key that can unlock just about anything. I was so excited that I got to use it for the first time last August for Mexico!
Before I talk about that trip, I’m going to tell a story.
My junior year at college, I had this professor, lets call him Dr. S. Dr. S. was the biggest douche bag I have ever had the pleasure of meeting. I loathed this man. He made me cry, he made me mad, he made me think, he made me question, he made me a more knowledgeable person.

So, my final for this class was a one on one with me and Dr. S. It was going to last 50 minutes and he would ask me one question of his choice and I had to tell him why I felt the way I did. I racked my brain, thinking the question would be about God or abortion or why I ate processed meat. Nope. He asked me the simplest, yet complicated question in the history of mankind. Here is how this final oral exam played out.

Dr. S.: Brooke, you didn’t speak much in class, so I’m curious to your answer to your final question….if you could do anything on earth right now, what would make you the happiest?
Me: (thinking to myself, ‘that’s it?!?! this crazy man wants to know what makes me freakin happy?!’) well…i would travel.
Dr. S.: Travel where?
Me: Everywhere.
Dr. S.: Then quit school.
Me: But, I need money to travel. This will be the hoop I jump through to travel.
Dr. S.: There are plenty of poor people who travel. Get a work visa. I know you’re religious, what if you travel to India and it changes your outlook on “God” (yes, he quoted it.)
Me: Well, school is important to me and my family too.
Dr. S.: Just like God is and the places you travel won’t believe in the same things as you and you will question the way you’re raised. Do you still think traveling will make you the happiest Brooke?
Me: yes sir, I do.

This conversation went on as to why I believe the things I do and surprisingly really did last 50 minutes.

I didn’t drop out of school to travel…shockingly. I have a degree and I travel some place new once a year. I don’t believe we aren’t meant to stay in one place. I yearn for new sites and new people. I remember seeing the Mayan Ruins in Cozumel and thinking how have I’ve missed so much of this world because I was set on going through the motions. I remember driving down the streets in the Cayman Islands and seeing children playing and thinking how small my problems seem. For years, I have stared at the ocean, last year, I was in it snorkeling. I’ve looked at surface for so long that I missed the point of it. I remember walking back on the beach after spending hours swimming with fish and turtles and feeling so accomplished that I got to see a whole different form of life I had been missing. I couldn’t believe that it had taken me 23 years to realize how big the world was.

Going to another country didn’t change my religion though. It made me understand the God I serve even more. That the same God who made me and my little world I had been surrounded by, made that weird purple colored fish I just touched underwater and he made the guy who made my margarita too strong. It fascinates me and makes me want to understand Him even more.

My fiancé proposed to me in the dark, in the front of the ship, in the Caribbean Ocean under millions of stars. I wouldn’t trade that moment for all the money in the world. I will never be the same after seeing those stars.

It doesn’t matter where you go, whether it’s Mexico, California, or an hour away, go some place you’ve never been. It’s worth any cost and sacrifice. If you wait to have money or for someone to come with you, you’ll never go. It’s a matter of courage and adventure. The world is cruel and we are so quick to think how bad it is, but the people I met while in Mexico last year, gave me hope. You don’t realize the people you’re missing out on or the places until you just go. One day, you won’t have the time.

Here is a couple of pictures from Mexico and The Cayman Islands!

10479999_10202630436031145_3830200449223090949_n 10561643_10202630434431105_2507443873071398059_n 10616203_10202630434831115_2080548090914233973_n 10628536_10202633766674409_6546562077876063630_n

Stay tuned to see our honeymoon ones! Next stop; St. Thomas!

XO,

B

Advertisements

The Haunting

So…today in my lovely daily calendar it read, “Do your heart a favor and forgive the one who’s hurt you the most.” Of course, without hesitation, i know exactly who the one was. Flash back six years ago, this 17 year old girl just left her hometown to move 3 hours away to a new school without anyone i knew!! SCORE! I remember being so excited that I finally got to be on my own. So much went on that year. It was one of the hardest, yet, most rewarding year of my life. At TN Tech, I wrote an essay and out of 2,000 people, I won. I won a huge scholarship that I didn’t tell anyone about. This is actually my first time mentioning it, ever. I knew then that I could write. That I could be more convincing on paper than with my tongue. Where my words fell short, my hands didn’t.

I also fell in love that year, for the first time in my life. It was my first love and it was indescribable. So was the heartbreak that followed. I learned that you can’t carry that heartbreak to new relationships if you want them to last. I lost one of my very good friends and almost my brother to a tragic accident. I learned to not take the ones you love for granted and to tell them you loved them every freakin day. I won’t go into details on any of these in this blog post but six years later, I didn’t realize how innocent I was. I thought I knew it all…I didn’t. I know that in six years, I’ll look back at 24 and realize I knew nothing now as well. And thats perfectly okay. If I didn’t move away, I wouldn’t have grown. I also wouldn’t have the chance the forgive the person I’m oh so haunted about. The living can haunt you more than the dead.

But, I realize in all my years growing and and learning, that forgiving is one of the hardest damn things I’ve learned to do since not eating 6 donuts in one sitting. I realized a long time ago that you shouldn’t let something that is long gone, control you. That you forgive not because that person deserves it, but because you deserve peace. I had a irrational dream and I woke up with my heart pounding and fighting mad. A dream I couldn’t control, tried to control me. I thought about throwing my coffee cup because I couldn’t yell at who I wanted to (I realized the cup had cupcakes on it so I decided against it). I wanted to be angry. Angry. Is. Easy. Forgiving isn’t.

Things like this, can control you if you let it. I started thinking about all the things I do wrong and my flaws and how God forgives me everyday. How I have to be more like Jesus and forgive even when I want to throw my coffee cup in a fit of rage.  I’ve learned a lot since those days in my cracker jack size dorm room but one that stuck is that you should forgive yourself. Forgive yourself for not having the foresight to know what now what seems obvious in hindsight. I’ve prayed for peace and patience and it seems like God shows 10 people that have wronged me all in the same day just to make me realize if I want a peaceful life, this is what I have to do. You never have to forget what people have done to you, but if you have peace in your heart, you’ll know you’re on the right path to forgiving them. Just think, nothing annoys someone more than you being silent when they expect you to be enraged.

XO,

B

some people who read this don’t have wordpress and can’t comment, so if you want to leave feedback, follow me and message me on instagram @brklynntrent or twitter @macaronsnmoose 🙂

Fight or Flight

It’s been a crazy week! First off, I want to thank everyone for taking the time to read my blog. It’s so amazing to get such wonderful feedback from family, friends and strangers. Y’all rock.

I’ve thought a lot about this post. It’s weird sharing personal things when I know everyone will read them and this is SO different for me.

Having a background in psychology makes me apply it to everything. Most people have heard of the “fight or flight” response. Saying, animals and humans have an innate ability to either face a problem and fight it or run (flight) when they feel threatened. I can’t help but to apply this to relationships. What’s worse than being in a relationship where you fight all the time? Being in a relationship where you fight then run.

One of the things I can’t get out of my head is the Hozier song, “Work Song”. If you haven’t listened to it, please do.
In the chorus he says, “When, my, time comes around lay me gently in the cold dark earth. No grave can hold my body down, I’ll crawl home to her”
The first time I heard those lyrics, I played it over and over again.

Music gets me. I feel more things emotionally from music than I can from most people. But, those lyrics make me feel some type of way. I have been in a relationship where I thought the world begins and ends with that person. Where I thought death couldn’t keep me away from him. With that being said, it was the most toxic thing I have ever been inflicted by. Human beings are 110% more toxic than anything else.

My brother and I have had many talks about which is better, a relationship that makes you feel like you’re so dependent on that person or one that makes you feel like you have it all together but that person just adds to your already great self? I think we all are guilty of trying to shove different puzzle pieces into the same spot and expecting to get the same picture in the end. Every choice, relationship wise or not, will lead you to a completely different outcome.

My thoughts on the situation is that I don’t ever want to feel like I need someone. I want to share a life with someone, not make someone my whole life. I’ve done that and at the end of the day, when they chose to leave, they’ll leave you standing with nothing. Most of us have had that relationship where it feels like you’re on a pendulum. When it’s good, it’s really good. But when it’s bad, it’s WWIII. There should be a balance. Someone should make you the best version of yourself and not make you hate yourself for the things you said during that knockout round.

No two loves are the same. Some people think that kind of love is the love that’s worth it. The kind that makes you crazy and the kind you think you can never obtain. And I’ll admit, I thought so too. But, it is so exhausting. I have been in relationships where I thought I saw someone’s true potential, even after everyone told me to take flight. You can’t wait on someone to ascend to their greatness when they don’t see if for themselves. We get disappointed when people fall short of the role we created for them without them ever even knowing it.

After going from a damaging relationship from the screaming fights to the on and off like a light switch to being on cloud 9 when he finally called back– to a healthy, loving, supportive relationship, I can’t say that I would care to feel like Hozier again. That song touches me because I know exactly what he’s speaking about and I know that’s exactly the person I don’t want to be. No body that loves you will allow you to love them more than you love yourself. Read that over again. Let it resonate. So, answering my own question, which is better? I think as long as you have someone who gives you their time, who talks to you after a fight, who understands the madness inside you, who supports you, who waits for you while you’re out trying to find yourself then you will be just fine.

XO,

B

5 Reasons to trade in a barstool for a bench press

I do occasionally have a drink with some friends but those 2 AM binges where the only words I know how to say are, “taco bell” and “bathroom?” are long gone. My friends, family can tell you that I am not the same girl I was at 20 and my needs/wants are constantly changing. At the gym the morning I was thinking how far I’ve come from that insecure, please everyone–type girl. Here are my personal top 5 reasons that a bench press is more suitable for me than a barstool:

1. The Morning After
This is the big one for me. I have yet to meet someone who has said, “those 10 shots I took last night made me feel so great this morning!!” There have been plenty of nights where I wanted to go out and once getting to the bar, it was not the experience I was hoping for. This morning I would have probably rather put my hand in my juicer than go to the gym. But, you know what? I didn’t regret going once I got there. Yeah, i’m sore but it’s not from throwing my guts up because I had too many grenades in NOLA, sore. It’s a change in my body getting stronger and better sore and I love every second of it. You wont regret going to the gym, but you might regret the kegger you sucked dry at the party you won’t remember last night.

2. Mood Swiiiinnnng
For me, there is a fine line between loving everyone I see at the bar and Mike Tyson coming through my body and wanting to punch the next person who spills their cute little martini on me. I can go from cute to ratchet faster than you can pour a drink. I don’t know about you but that is so unattractive to me. I don’t ever want to be in a state where I have no control over my emotions again. I used to leave work and be so stressed, I wanted a drink. Now, I leave work and go to the gym and 10 times out of 10, I am in a much better mood when I leave. The gym heals me mentally more than any amount of alcohol ever will.

3. Socializing
Most people go out to meet people or to spy on their ex boyfriends new girl. Some people go out so they can have someone to go home with a few hours later. Either way, in the long run, has either made you happy? I know some of the people i’ve met while bar hopping is not the type of people I want in my life consistently. At the gym, I am surrounded by people who support me. Whether they give me the encouragement I need or they just want to chat, I can promise you they aren’t there to watch me fail like half of the people who are your friends at the bar.

4. How Embarrassing

I have had multiple females tell me they don’t work out because they feel judged or embarrassed. Come to find out, those are the same females taking 4 Irish Breakfast shots and dancing with the pool stick like it’s a stripper pole. Being embarrassed and lazy aren’t the same thing. If one reason you aren’t actively in the gym is because of what other people think, I promise you, we’ve all been there. The people who look Victoria’s Secret perfect, had to start somewhere. Everyone has to start somewhere and NO ONE judges you for making yourself better. If they do, screw them and go head girl, get down in your cute spandex. You’re perfect.

5. Music
This one may be weird but it is so true. When I am at the gym or running, I can listen to whatever I want. Currently “Chainsaw,” is my go-to workout song. I also do not have to hear the dance version of the Wobble ever again! Or more importantly, 50 drunk people thinking they can actually do the Wobble.

This blog is different but it’s important to me because the older I get, the more I realize I don’t want to be 50 years old drinking margaritas at Chili’s until I don’t remember my name. I want to work hard and be in the best shape of my life. Alcohol gives you an instant buzz, you see results almost instantly even though most of the time, they aren’t the results you want. With the gym, it takes work and dedication and endless hours put into it. But, the results are so much more rewarding.

XO,

B

Also, if you are looking for some new active gear, here is where I purchase all of mine 🙂